Fa-Fa-Fa-Fashion

Ok, so I am looking for some feedback and guidance on this topic.

I recently made the decision to refocus my wardrobe and collection and start to acquire more high end fashion items. A little material maturation if you will. I'm after key pieces that every girl should have. So I started to make a list of what I want / should get. I know this is a costly endeavour, but I see it as an investment. High quality and classic style will last for years to come. While it will take years to get around to accumulating this collection, this is how it is starting to shape up:

- a few functional and versatile hand bags

- a belted trench (I have an off white one for fall/spring, but could use a winter one)

- a cashmere scarf (likely classic Burberry check)

- Hermès gloves

- a classic timepiece

- a statement piece (jewelry) 

- functional, yet stylish flats

- a killer pair of heels (have my eye on some Choo's)

- the perfect LBD

So now I turn it over to you. What else should be on my list? Any specific examples of things that I have mentioned?

Halp! Thanks in advance.

xoxo

Working for the Weekend

Is everyone working for the weekend? Are they going off the deep end? Are you happy in your current position? If you aren't, maybe it is time for a change. That might be easier said than done, but it is worth trying!

In business, it can become very easy to be controlled by your bottom line and to be blinded from the bigger picture. Of course you want to be productive and profitable, but sometimes you have to spend money to make money. The cheapest and easiest way to get from A to B may not be the best solution if you eventually have to get from A to Z. Look at the innovative companies out there and what they do for their employees, much of their success is due to the fact that their employees are happy and productive. Building a positive and productive climate will help you retain your employees, which is key for long term success.

It isn't always about big, elaborate, over the top ideas. Perhaps small and semi regular incentives can make a significant difference. Recently I read that the number 1 factor in employee satisfaction was having a flexible schedule. Providing flexibility makes it easier for employees to keep up with their lives beyond the workplace and I would assume that subsequently, these people have much less life stress getting in the way of their work. Incentives are a great way to motivate people into action. However, there are caveats: a pizza lunch, or cupcakes might improve your team's dynamic and attitude for the day, but are there any long term effects of a cheap lunch once per quarter? I think not. Don't get too smug, just because you do a nice gesture once. Small incentives and gestures of appreciation can go a long way. Sometimes your situation may limit what you can offer. But if you have the ability to go big, do it! Bear in mind the old adage 'penny wise, pound foolish'. Don't become a victim of your bottom line.

"Once in a while you can squeeze a 70 hour work week from someone if you promise them a big bonus. However, if you want to dedicate their idle brain cycles to the success of the company, if you want them to act as a team and to avoid the pursuit of their personal gain in petty office politics, you need to enable them to win big when the company wins big. When a company decides not to give equity to it's employees, it focuses so much on the short term that it's bound to become irrelevant ten years from now." -YG (In: Next Montreal)

Also, I think it is important to take a chance on those still rising to their full potential. Companies seem so bent on finding the best in the industry, someone with a proven track record, which intuitively makes sense. But that person has already developed their style and methods and may not fit into every situation. Instead there should be a shift in focus to moulding fresh talend to suit your company and team of employees. Everyone wants a guarantee of performance, but there is always a learning curve, no matter how much experience you have.

“Do not hire a man who does your work for money, but him who does it for love of it” - Thoreau

When to Stop

Lately I have been thinking about when to stop. As my friend so frequently reminds me with the following phrase: "start at the beginning and when you get to the end - stop".

But where is the end? How do you know?

Sometimes it can be really obvious, but more and more I am realizing that it isn't always so black and white. In a slightly trivial example, I am currently searching for a great hotel to stay at in NYC. Now we are only there for 3 nights and we only have 2 full days and want to maximize our time in the city. There are so many factors at play here, location and price being at the top of the list, but we also want to stay somewhere nice, it is ladies weekend afterall and we want to indulge a bit. So how do I know that a hotel is good enough? If I keep looking maybe I will find a better deal? I don't want to be disappointed!

Similarly, I was just discussing with someone the perils of shopping for a wedding dress. How do you really know that you have found the perfect dress. Some people say that there is just a feeling and you just know. But what if you don't get the "feeling" or you get a lot of "feelings" how do you decide? And how can you be confident that once you commit to a dress you won't change your mind.

Obviously, these examples may seem silly, but this idea applies to greater things as well. I am once again working on my manuscript. Another situation where there is no set completion point. You write a paper, you do your best to make it thorough and credible, but now you need to adjust it to fit the audience you are hoping to submit it to. Does it ever end? There will always be revisions you can make, so how do you know when you are at the end and just STOP?

What does it take to be satisfied?

Perspective

Life happens, how will you handle the curve balls life chucks at your head?

Does everything happen for a reason? Or is that just something we say to make ourselves feel better and justify a situation? I believe there is something to be learned from every life experience, is that the same concept?

Recently, yet again, I found myself with a cancelled flight in my connecting location. This time I was in Minneapolis/St Paul for a full 2 days before I could get back home. At first this seemed like cruel and unusual punishment. The location was not all that entertaining but it gave me time to reflect. After the initial panic and reacting without thinking through all of my options, I started to see the big picture. Aside from the cost that this delay would incur, what did I have to lose being there? Sure there would be some mild issues with time off at work, but in the grand scheme of things, I had nothing planned for the 2 days I was stuck in Minnesota. No one was going to die, the world would continue to spin, life would go on. Besides my job, which doesn’t require my presence, nothing was waiting for me, nothing is relying on me, I have no real responsibility. It made me realize how I have nothing critical going on in my life and despite appearances, I do have a lot of freedom right now.

My financial obligations (rent, bills, etc) quickly make me feel like a prisoner to the daily grind. But this experience opened my eyes to the fact that I can do anything I want right now (within reasonable limits). My current job is temporary, I do want to maintain an income, but losing this job wouldn’t really have a negative impact on my larger life.

As much as part of me would love to just pick up and disappear for a while, I can’t do it without a purpose (or maybe I can?). But I promise that as soon as I find a purpose (or enough courage), I will make the change. Now if only it were that easy, to just let go of the "responsibilities" I have and feel obligated to. But I maintain the hope.

Anyone up for an adventure?

Vacation

Vacation is critical for survival. I think everyone should take the time and make the effort. Maybe you can't afford to galavant across the globe, but even a few days out of the city away from your "daily life" is important so you can relax and recharge.

Proof that vacation does me good:



Quarterlife Crisis

There has been research and discussion as of late, suggesting that the quarterlife crisis is now more common than the midlife crisis. I know I can certainly relate to many things discussed in the following article. I am sure you can too.

Quarterlife-Crisis

Very interesting and enlightening read. Enjoy.

Failure

I am grateful for this day.

Sometimes life can throw a lot at you and it can be a lot to take. My life seems to have established a pattern of all or nothing. When negative things start to happen, it quickly becomes a rapid fire of disappointment, pain, and rejection in various parts of my life, and I am left to try to sort it all out while life carries on with or without me. We often dwell on the overwhelming amount of negativity we experience, especially if it seems constant, and in doing so we can miss the more subtle cues of positivity surrounding us. Maybe you had a bad day, but was every moment of that day bad? Or were there some positive moments tucked in there too?

I know it is not easy to pick yourself up and dust yourself off, time and time again, in order to keep going, especially when you keep getting knocked down. You should not be ashamed of your struggle, but rather rejoice that you have come through it and share it with others. It is ok to take a break from being strong and allow yourself some time to be weak. Personally, I usually end up in the fetal position, crying until I can’t breathe. But remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day – what I mean is, an afternoon of crying is not typically followed by a day of being a super hero. The next day should be a small improvement on the day before. For me this means, limiting my crying to short bouts and finding distractions.  Eventually you “get mad, get strong, wipe your hands, shake it off, then you stand”.

It is exceptionally challenging when you have to struggle and fight in isolation. I have some of the most amazing friends in the world, and I am ever so thankful that our paths led us to each other; however, I am very sad that none of these individuals live in the same city as me. But I am also very thankful for technology that allows us to stay connected despite our geographical proximity. I try to focus on the positive, but I know all too well that even that may not be enough. I have a vacation coming up in 16 days, while I am looking forward to it, the prospect of this trip is not sufficient to pull me out of this funk.

What lesson can I learn from my latest series of rejection and failure? Well, if the past is any indication of the future, I will experience these negative funks again and again. And just like the past, I will get through them, maybe a little worse for wear, maybe a little better?

Positive moments today:
- making delicious pasta with fresh zucchini and onions
- being told I am a “whiz” with wedding stuff
- made plans to hang out with my favourite 15 month old this weekend